How to Attract a Winner and Avoid all the Losers on an Interracial Dating Site

Monday, January 11, 2016

Are you already signed up to use an interracial dating site?  Great!  In just a matter of time you’ll be sorting through profiles and posting black women looking for white men ads to your heart’s content.  But how can you avoid the most common missteps that people make when using these matchmaking sites for the first time?

You may find that with some practice going on a date with a person or getting a video chat with them is fairly easy.  However, making “sparks” happen on that second or third date (or virtual date) may be a bit more complicated.  Obviously, you want to find a “winner” and avoid the losers that are going to:
  1. Be boring and disappoint you with a lack of chemistry
  2. Be a total creep and psycho
  3. Be nothing but drama and stress in your life

This means that you are looking for someone who is self-confident, interesting to talk to and free from any serious mental disorders that are, sometimes latent, but usually always more stressful to deal with than the romance itself.  

Do Your Research and Make the Conversation Interesting

In general, it is best to steer the conversation away from sex as well as the whole “why are you attracted to me?” conversation until you’ve had more time to establish trust.  Some people are very sensitive about their attraction to blacks, whites, Asians, and so on, and may be embarrassed to talk about it as soon as you meet.
Strangely enough, you may find “losers” who are only on the dating site because they just want to complain about their ex, get revenge on their ex, cheat on their wife and girlfriend, and are just confused in general.  This is why you might want to take it slow and not have sex on the first or second or even third date, just so you can spend a bit more time learning about the other person and discovering any secret motivations.
Flirting is all well and good but if you really want to “go the distance” with someone you like, spend more time talking about your mutual goals in life, your hobbies, fond memories of the past and your views on the world.  The more you know a person, the more you can sense your true chemistry together…and yes, the better sex is too!

Watch Out for Men / Women Who Want a “Stereotype”

Another unexpected problem in interracial dating: that peculiar person who wants to date a “stereotype.”  You might not think this is much of a problem at first…until you realize that they actually want you to be someone else.  They think you’re going to be a stereotypical black person, Asian, white person and so on.  They have an idea of who you should be but are not really interested in who you are.
It’s okay to respect someone’s culture and to envy that culture, that lifestyle they bring with them.  But once someone starts requesting that you be a stereotype, and that you act more like a real African, real Latino, real Asian, etc. it just gets to be ridiculous and insulting.  
A real “winner” that you’re going to find on interracial dating sites is going to be attracted to your race, but one who will fall in love with you and only you!
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